Tis the season...

...to be sick. At least that seems to be the way it always is for me. It seems like I've been sick a lot lately, and I can tell you I'm sick of it! Between migraines and the worst bout of stomach flu I've had in at least five years, I've been barely existing for awhile. But now I seem to be back to normal, for a little while at least. Let's keep our fingers crossed. I managed to stay healthy during Christmas at least, and I've managed to avoid the cold going around our office this week.

Christmas was a lot of fun and, though I had a hard time getting into the spirit of things this year, I ended up feeling far from scroogey during the holiday itself. Mom was moved to tears with her presents and Dad and I got to go out for awhile on Christmas day to utilize our new toys: a GPS and digital camera. We had a wonderful Christmas dinner and even went to two masses on Christmas eve. That was good considering I didn't make it to church the weekend before because I was too busy puking my guts out.

I had Monday off from work, so I got together with neowolf and lizalou and we rented Kronk's New Groove. It was hilarious, by the way, and right up there with the first movie, so I highly recommend it. The only part in it that was really iffy was Yzma's strangely out of place song. Otherwise, it was awesome. I need to see it again though to remember the quotes. We also spent some time completely revamping our graphic novel concept. That went really well and we made a lot of progress. I'm excited to get to work on it again.

This week has been a little stressful at work considering the bosses are out of town and things that have been sitting on the shelf for months have a tendancy to come up and rear their heads when the bosses are gone. So, it's been a bit hectic trying to get everything taken care of for the clients. But the week's almost over now and we have monday off...whew. It's been nice though because I went out to eat with my fellow artist earlier in the week and wandered around the River Market. That was a lot of fun and that BBQ sandwich was awesome. Then, today, I went out to eat with the G man and Big Bold D at the Thai place down the street. I've had some good eatin' this week. Especially when you throw in the pizza we ordered for lunch/dinner on monday. I need to be careful or I'm going to start gaining weight again.

Boy, this is a boring post, isn't it? Just my everyday boring life... I'll try to be more exciting next time. :)

Here, I'll leave you with a picture from the chapter of Fruits Basket I just read. It made me weepy and I was surprised by Shigure. I never can nail him down... but I guess that's why he's such a fun character. But I'm still weeping over Kyo... Wah!

Shock Therapy

It's rare that I talk about American television. I talk about Lost occasionally, but that's about it. Thursday is my TV watching night with my main girls, theCallowQueen and her roomie. We watch Apprentice, and Alias and Lost from the night before. I have choir rehearsals on Wednesday nights so my Lost watching schedule is difficult.

Anyway, it's no secret that Alias has been disappointing me big time over the last season and a half. I have been disgusted with the shallow plot, the half-assed way they tried to "wrap up" the Rambaldi plot which had been my main interest in the show from the beginning and the degradation of the characters into two dimensional mindless zombies. In the case of Nadia, she actually did become a zombie. Nevertheless, I continued watching while Vaughn died unnecessarily (perhaps very necessarily for the heartbroken actor) and Weiss left and Sloan played a regurgitated plot role and Marshall became nothing more than the comic relief. I was sad, but it had become tradition to watch Alias. This season I found myself not minding the new characters too much. I even thought Tom was pretty cool though I realized it was unlikely that we will ever see his backstory. But, for the most part, I've learned to prepare myself for disappointment with the way Alias is now.

Last week's episode was pretty fun with Sark's reappearance. He brought back some of the flavor fo Alias as it used to be. And then there was last night's episode. I thought they were going to pull another one of those, "Oh you thought he was dead, but he's really alive. Ha ha" tricks that they've pulled almost every time someone dies. But instead, they brought Michael Vartan on the show only for an episode that dealt with Sydney's memories of Vaughn and forced her to say goodbye to him. It was touching and sweet and made me remember just how cool the show used to be. The scene in which Sydney "threw her cell phone into the Pacific...twice" I enjoyed especially. I think that psychological stuff like this is one of Alias' strengths (and one of my personal interests) so I enjoyed seeing Sydney take a jaunt through her mind even if it was forced upon her by some evil doctor and even if her lips were so puffy they looked like they were going to eat her face. Vaughn was the old Vaughn I loved before he suddenly--at the beginning of the season--had a prior life, another name and an obsession with Prophet 5. (All I have to say about Prophet 5 is that it better have something to do with Rambaldi, even though that will make it even more of a plot regurgitation.)

So, I was really enjoying the episode--especially the return of the hardball Jack and his interaction with Rene who has a very similar style--and then, in the last thirty seconds, it went from really good to OMGWTF?! Irina Dorevko, spy mommy as she is lovingly called by many an internet Alias fan, showed herself as the one who was holding Sydney captive and ordering the doctor to sift through her memories. It was a complete surprise. There was such a hullabaloo last season about the actress being unwilling to come back on the show, but they finally got her for the last several episodes. Still, I didn't expect her to come back again, at least not without a bit of warning. It was awesome! She is so cool. Even if she is after her own grandbaby.

So, then we watched Apprentice. And I had my second shock of the evening, this time an unpleasant one. I had loved Randal all throughout the show and I was really torn between him and Rebecca at the end. I wanted both of them to be hired, and I really thought the Donald would do it. Then, as the show went on, Randal acted very out of character from what I expected. He was disrespectful to Rebecca and rather cut throat. I was surprised and very disappointed, but I can only think that he was influenced by friends and family during his break from the show to stop being a nice guy and make sure he won at any cost.

Then, the moment of truth came: Randal was the new Apprentice. But then the Donald mentioned hiring Rebecca also, as I had expected. I got excited. I clenched the blanket I was huddled beneath and held my breath. And what did Randal do? He completely lost all of my respect and stabbed Rebecca in the back. She may not be perfect, but few people deserve the abuse everyone put her through. It was disgusting. I'm also peeved at the Donald for just letting Randal decide whether or not to hire Rebecca. I mean, who's the boss here? I really feel no desire to watch the Apprentice again. I'm soured on the whole show.

So, last night was a rather traumatizing night for me with all the shocks. I'm not sure why they affected me so strongly, but it was certainly exhausting. I get way too into my television, don't I? This is one of the reasons why I watch so little TV. The main reason, though, is that most shows on TV right now suck. But every now and then you find a little jewel.

So, how many weeks until we get a new episode of LOST?

Angel Test

This test from lizalou42's site was far too perfect considering my previous post. I got the same result as she did... Hmmm....


Guardian

Class: Archangel
Alliance: Light

You are a caring soul and somewhat of a people
person. You are very concerned about others and
about the world around you. You like connecting
with people and always want to be of help. As a
guardian your role would be to watch over the
human souls on earth and help them when they
are in trouble.

Your Angelic Name: Raphael


Which Warrior Angel are You and Whose Side are You On? (With Anime Pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

Angelic Inspiration

I've recently noticed that the subject matter of most of the reading I've been doing lately has dealt with angels and demons and a war between heaven and hell. The scary thing is that I didn't even make the connection when I chose which books to read. Is it something subconscious, I wonder...? Perhaps it has something to do with the number of shojo manga which use this subject...

Whatever the motivation for my reading choices, I recently finished Wish, a short, four book series by CLAMP, my favorite group of collaborative ladies in the manga industry. This is an older series of theirs, made before their style matured into mediocrity. The plot centers around a misfit, airheaded angel named Kohaku and her desire to repay a human's kindness with a wish. As can be expected from the first chapter practically, Kohaku eventually falls in love with this human named Shuichiro and this causes all kind of havoc in heaven and hell. But Kohaku isn't the first one to break the taboo. Her mentor and one of the four Angel Masters has also fallen in love with someone she shouldn't, a demon, and the son of Satan no less. It's a tangled story of forbidden love and before the end of the story, the threat of an all-out war between heaven and hell looms on the horizon. In classic Clamp fashion, hints of shonen ai creep in at various points through the story, and heaven has an incredibly cute bunny for a messenger.

One of my favorites aspects of Wish were the omakes at the end of each book. I wish that CLAMP had time to make omakes for their later series. I adored them in Rg Veda, and they were fun in Wish as well. I would love to see them in Tsubasa and xxxHoLic. But alas, they are too busy for their own good. And too busy to finish X... but that's another story entirely.

Speaking of X, the other angelic series I've been reading lately has a major apocalyptic theme centering on the year 1999. I can't help but make the connection between the two. Angel Sanctuary is one of those series I've looked at countless times in the bookstore and considered buying, but I didn't actually decide to pick it up until the art book came out in English and I couldn't resist the beautiful, tragic artwork. I've seen the OVA twice now, and enjoyed it quite a bit though it's rather confusing. The books are barely less so because the story moves rather quickly and involves quite a bit of mythology--even the manga-ka admits she had to cut out more of the plot than she would have liked due to space constraints. Still, I'm enjoying the story a lot despite Kaori Yuki's strange affection for incestuous love quadrangles. She often talks about how weird her tastes are, but I love her even more for her attitude about it.

The story of Angel Sanctuary is a bit more complicated than Wish, but it also involves forbidden love and taboo among angels. There is also an impending war between heaven and hell as well as intrigue among the angels. Heaven is painted as much less righteous in this story, and many of the angels are more corrupt than the demons. Now that I can finally read through the series in order (I had bought the first book and books 4-6 months ago but held off on buying 2 and 3 because they didn't match in design, but I finally decided to buy them anyway, even though the numbers on the side were reversed out of black boxes instead of white on black), I also have the opportunity to get addicted--which I have done. Thankfully, I already own a number of the books, so I shouldn't be stuck on a cliffhanger for awhile.

I don't know if any of the readers of my blog (if there are any of you still out there) will really enjoy this post, but perhaps there is someone out there who will do a search for one of these series and find my brief reviews of them helpful... Otherwise, it's still kind of nice for me to have a record of what I've read.

New Faces New Places

So here I am, sitting my desk in our new office finally updating my blog (in between bites of leftover spaghetti). Between the packing and the moving and the unpacking and the drama and the new people and the last minute hot projects... my work life has been insane. Unfortunately, I've been so exhausted by my work life that my personal life has been nearly non-existent the last few weeks. Add to that the stomach flu I had a couple weeks ago and the migraine that wiped me out for the first portion of this week, and I know I have been more than a little antisocial--not by choice, though.

Anyway, I don't really feel like going into all the drama which has accompanied this move of our office, so I'll just say that we're finally settling in and it seems to be working out pretty well. The artists have a great view of the River Market from our room and up until a few minutes ago I was enjoying watching the flurries of snow fly past the windows. Then we decided closing the blinds might keep some of the heat in (our office has heating issues right now) and sacrificed the view for warmth.

We moved our office in with a PR company so we have some new faces in the office. They've all been really friendly and fun to work with so far, so it's a good thing. We're such a small place to start with that it's refreshing to have more people around.

Though I'm about ready to run up to the third floor and tell the woman who has been stomping around up there nonstop the last few days to take her clogs off and walk barefoot. I've never heard a person walk so loudly in an office. Oh boy, now she's dragging things across the floor. We really need a broomstick to pound against the ceiling.

Miscellaneous Addendum

We are moving our office this week, so there are boxes, boxes, boxes everywhere! And where the hell did I put my pens? Poor Sephiroth will no longer glare at me from the wall and the Endless family portrait with cats will no longer adorn my workspace. I have no cute, tiny stuffed animals to keep me company, and I won't know the date becuase my desk calendar has already been packed. So, I can look at the date on my computer, I know... I'll stop whining now. Unfortunately, the wall scrolls and goofy stuffed animals/toys, etc will likely never return to my workspace. I'll be sharing a room with three other people now, and I don't think they'll probably appreciate my taste. Besides there probably won't be room for such things.

I had a good but busy weekend. I went to a birthday party on Friday and saw the new Harry Potter movie. I approve for the most part, though I'm getting annoyed with how Hogwarts just keeps getting bigger and more luxurious with every movie. The Griffindor common room looks so overdone. I liked how it was before because that was exactly how I imagined it. Now it's like a gaudy hotel suite. I thought all the Triwizard tournament stuff was pretty much how I imagined it. Harry's transformation when he went under water was a little bit much, but other than that, I thought it was fairly accurate. The Quidditch World Cup was awesome as well.

One of my major complaints about the movie though would have to be Dumbledore. He was way too emotional and angry in this movie. The Dumbledore of the early movies (granted, the actor is no longer with us, but the new actor could still act a little more like the original) was very quiet and reserved which is how imagine Dumbledore. Yes, he gets angry at times, but he DOES NOT throw tantrums. Grrr.... And lastly, let's talk about the Weasley hair. Ron's bad hair could be forgiven considering he was such a jerk in that book, but Fred and George have mullets! Cut your hair boys!

Good things: Snape was hilarious, Harry's crush on Cho continuously cracked me up, and the scene in the bathtub with Harry and Moaning Myrtle was great. Cedric was also very well cast. Sigh. It was sad.

Okay, back to my weekend... Saturday I hung out with lizalou, did some shopping, ate some green tea ice cream, talked some story writing and then went to AM's Bonfire. I had a lot of fun, especially watching R get chased around by Bullet and seeing N give four people a piggyback ride at once. That girrrl's strong! Too bad all the smoke has played such havoc with my voice. I still sound like a frog. Oh well, it was worth it...

And Sunday? Not terribly exciting. I did some laundry, formatted my new draft of my story and played some video games. I also watched the first couple episodes of Yakitate Japan! but it really follows the manga in the beginning so I haven't seen anything new just yet.

Well, here are some memes I stoll from lizalou and took like a week ago but didn't post until now. Yeah, I'm Bert... oh well. And I guess if I'm yaoi, it has to be CLAMP yaoi. :) I think they simply influenced me too much.



Bert
You scored 79% Organization, 63% abstract, and 49% extroverted!This test measured 3 variables.
Here is why you are Bert.

You are both very organized. You almost always know where your belongings are and you prefer things neat. You may even enjoy cleaning and find it therapeutic. Bert is a big neat freak and gets quite annoyed when Ernie makes a big mess.


You both are sometimes concrete and sometimes abstract thinkers. Bert is probably a bit more concrete in his bottlecap collecting addiction and his love of the weather. He does show his abstract side when he sings and performs his "Doin' The Pidgeon" song. You have a good balance in your life. You know when to be logical at times, but you also aren't afraid to explore your dreams and desires... within limits of course.


You are both somewhat introverted. Bert is probably more introverted, because he spends most of his time either with Ernie or alone. Still he has no problem being around other people in his role as chairman of "The National Association of 'W' Lovers." Like Bert, you probably like to have some time to yourself, but you do appreciate spending time with your friends, and you aren't scared of social situations.

Link: The Your SESAME STREET Persona Test written by greencowsgomoo on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

You are the Angsty uke! Melancholy and quiet, you seem to be haunted by some bad memories or a dark past. Your greatest fear is loosing everything or everyone you care about, and for
this reason you will shy away from romantic advances.


What type of uke are you?
brought to you by Quizilla



You are the Uber Seme! Agressive and dominant, you will always get what you want no matter who gets hurt in the process. You also have a tendancy to be extremely posessive of your uke.


What type of seme are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Special Powers

I had an awesome dream last night in which I was a telekinetic. Don't know where that random thought came from, but it was really cool. I wasn't very good at using my powers, unfortunately, but I had just discovered I had them so it makes sense that they were weak. The majority of the dream involved me picking up and moving around various objects with my mind. Then I ran into my friend lizalou and she discovered she was a telekinetic also. We were moving inanimate objects all over the place and showing people and freaking them out. Then we did some research online and found out that there were only 3000 people in the universe who had that power. Don't know really what that means, or why it was the "universe" instead of the "world."

Anyway, it was a really cool dream, and I woke up really believing for a few moments that I could move things with my mind if I just concentrated hard enough. But, sadly, I failed.

Thinking about telekinesis inevitably makes me think of that Babylon 5 episode where Talia's former lover shows up and gives her special powers and she finds at the end of the episode that she can fling a penny at the wall. But then all I can think about is her really disturbing conversation with Sinclair in that episode about telepaths making love. If I were going to share intimate details of my life with someone, it certainly wouldn't be with Bran Flake man.

Why is it always rainy on Halloween? It's odd just how consistent this correlation is... I pity the poor children forced to walk around in genie or fairy outfits with skin exposed to the cold, wet air. Hopefully the weather will clear up for them. I say that, and yet part of me thinks that I hope it doesn't clear up because it never cleared up for me when I was a little kid and I always had to go trick or treating in the rain. And walk up hill both ways too! Yeah!

Anyway, I had a nice weekend. Had fun at lizalou's b-day/halloween party. Worked on some creative stuff. Finished Ouendan (now it's time for the expert level!). Suffered with my addiction to Death Note. I was also really tired over the weekend even though I got more sleep than I should have needed. I also dreamed a lot, so perhaps that was why the sleep didn't seem terribly effective. I feel pretty good today, luckily. And tonight I will get to see the Mirage of Blaze OAV, the sequel. And boy does it look like some yaoi goodness. Oh, yes. And maybe we'll actually get a little bit of resolution to the storyline too. That would be awesome. Speaking of yaoi, I've already decided that I will absolutely have to find some Death Note doujinshi when I go to Japan again--because I will go to Japan again. It will happen. I just know it.

I found some really amusing pictures of Japanese Death Note cosplayers as well. It totally cracked me up. They're very serious about it in the pictures, and for a second I actually thought it was live action. (lizalou, I'm guessing this is where you got that icon from that you were telling me about).

I'm kind of blah today as far as thinking of creative things to say. Partially because I have this weird kink in my neck that's really annoying. But, anyway, enough whining. I'll make another post when I have more to say, I guess...

Lessons

I had a dream the other night that I was at a flute lesson. I haven't taken flute lessons since high school, but in my dream it was as if I had only taken a break for the summer and had started flute lessons again along with school—though I did comment in my dream that it felt a lot longer than just a summer. I don't remember a lot of details about my dream, in fact it seemed rather ordinary aside from the fact that it was out of date, but it definitely brought back emotions I hadn't felt in a long time. I love music, and I definitely loved it back then, between participating in choir and band in school and Youth Symphony, Wind Ensemble and Flute Choir outside of school. I took flute lessons and voice lessons and competed as a soloist. Looking back, I wonder how I had the energy for all of that—or the time. Of course, back then I had few friends, so socializing took up little of my time.

Anyway, so in my dream I was sitting at my flute teacher's house and we were talking before we started the lesson. I would always try to prolong this part because I really enjoyed talking with my teacher, but also prolonged it because I often failed to practice as much as I should have. I scraped by most of the time on talent I guess, because I could have been a lot better if I had been more dilligent about practicing. But anyway, there were many times when I felt like my flute teacher was a mentor for me in ways beyond music. Always calm, always thoughtful and supportive, Dr. Johnson was often a therapist for me as well as an instructor. I admired her a lot, and now that I think about it, I would say that she was a bit of a role model for me. I can't say I have become anything like her, but I certainly always respected her and looked up to her. She was so elegant in everything she did. Her handwriting was immaculate, she always paused before she spoke and carefully considered her words (a habit I certainly could use a little help with). She was classy and eloquent, and an excellent teacher as well.

So, enough gushing. The question is: why did I have a dream about her? I think I have an idea. I'm feeling a little lost right now, a little confused on my direction in life. All my life I've worked hard, and reaped the rewards of that effort, but there is only one area academically that I would continuously fail. I excelled in music when I was a big fish in a little pond. I even excelled in slightly bigger ponds. But when the pond got too big, when I was asked to perform at an even higher level, I would always reach a point where I crumbled under the pressure. A point where I began to doubt myself. I knew I could do it, but I would doubt myself at a critical moment and drop the ball. And now, I feel like I'm doing the same thing. I'm at that point in my career. I need to reach that next level, but it feel's like climbing a sheer cliff. I'm trying so hard, but there comes a time when it's not about effort anymore; it's about confidence and believing in yourself and pushing yourself beyond your boundaries and overcoming obstacles.

Fixed

I think I should have the glitches with my blog fixed. If you are still having viewing problems, please let me know. According to callowqueen I had already fixed the problem for her, though it still showed up when I was testing the page on my PC. Anyway, it looks right on my PC now so I hope it looks right for everyone else as well.

I'm working on updating my website now—a project I've needed to work on for quite some time now... Unfortunately, it's one of those tasks that just gets put off until you get to the point where you look at your design and think, “I could do so much better than that now.’ Then you find yourself wanting to redo it all, but then you'll get distracted before you finish and by the time you get back around to it again you won't like that design either.

So, I'm taking Franklin McMahon's advice and just jumping in, even if it isn't perfect. I can continue adjusting it as I go, but the important thing is to get content up there. Part of the reason I've been holding off on writing more of my fanfic is because I wanted to direct people to my newly redesigned website in the post. I'm pathetic, I know. But maybe I'll actually get that done too if I get the website done. I'm sick of having unfinished projects laying around everywhere. They start to wear on you after awhile.

I'll leave you with a little tidbit I found when I was browsing the internet the other day. The Surrealist has a bunch of random word and name games and I had fun playing around with them. Here are a couple I think you might appreciate.

Infinite Teen Slang Dictionary

yellow dancer
v. to dance with things, with no purpose or reason.
"I can't believe Dad tried to yellow dancer!"

sti fre min
n. slang for a particular chain of fast-food burger restaurants.
"My man, are you coming down to sti fre min's?"

shittah
adj. of a cheap nature.
"Reggie! That's totally shittah!"

good clue
n. a particularly colourful video.
"Homie, where's my good clue?"

shiz
interj. a retort used to warn someone to back away.
"You'd better shiz, Jesse."

clandestine
interj. a statement of strong disagreement.
"Nigel, can I understand your vehicle?" "Clandestine!"

What Weekend?

Dude, I need a weekend from my weekend. It was mostly fun, but I'm totally wiped out from it... I want to curl up in a ball and go back to bed SO BAD!

I took off early Friday (though not as early as expected) to go to Lawrence with neowolf for Late Night in the Phog (who knew 6:30 was "late night). We ate a wonderful, very filling linner--or dunch, whichever you prefer to call lunch/dinner--at El Mezcal. Then we headed over to Allen Fieldhouse to wait in line. It was a beautiful day for sitting outside, so we didn't mind. Our seats weren't as awesome as the seats we got a couple years ago, but we did get programs though I had to steal one of them back sneakily when one of the people around us tried to steal it (Just because I picked up the M&M's package that I was using as a paperweight for one second doesn't mean I forfeit my right to the program. This isn't capture the flag! You can't claim the base just because I want an M&M!). So, anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, so there are a lot of new players and I'm totally confused because half of them picked the same numbers as people who had just graduated--or left for, ahem, other reasons. It's going to take me awhile to forget that Simien was 23 and Giddens was 15. Gah!

There is also an incredibly cute redhead who is actually from Overland Park on the team this year. Neowolf and I were acting all goofy about him, but then I noticed that he's a redshirted Freshman and I wanted to cry! No redhead cutie on TV basketball games for us! Oh well. Some of the newbies look pretty kickass already talent-wise, though--Mario Chalmers and Micah Downs in particular. The fieldhouse has gotten a major facelift as well. The new scoreboard is pretty cool, though I have to admit I miss the cheesy Rock Chalk animations from the old scoreboard. The videos they played were pretty amusing at points as well, especially when things got shiny. It's difficult to describe, but I can only conclude that though the video was from games in the past, the video itself must be from the future. ;)

So, after Late Night, we made our way back to the car, and then back to KC. We stopped off at my house to pick up some things and then headed for neowolf's new place to meet up with lizalou. We ran to Quiktrip for some beverageonies (ie cappuccino) and then giggled, played some Osa! Tatakae! Ouendan! and Nintendogs on the DS (enough to make me obsessed) and then we watched some Heat Guy J. Funny name for a really good show. It's such a pretty show and I was so tired when we watched it that I thought I might have hallucinated it. The fact that all the characters look like Escaflowne characters didn't help...

We stayed up till 4am or so, slept until 10:30 and then picked up some lunch. Saturday is pretty much a blur because I was so tired, but there was more Heat Guy watching, giddiness about Death Note between lizalou and I and then at some point I made my way home and went to bed--but only after taking a nice long bath. Baths feel so good when you haven't gotten enough sleep, or showered all day.

Sunday, I played my flute at mass, sang with the choir, ran some errands around town, helped my parents on getting the house ready for the carpeting and linoleum people and painted a room. Then this morning I had a 7:30 am doctor appointment, so I had to force myself out of bed, eat breakfast in the living room (yes, our refrigerator is in the living room, as is our dining table and stove. It's so weird!) and head in the opposite direction from work for my appointment. I still ended up getting to work really early so I made this post.

And here we are. Is it naptime yet?

tests

A few tests I borrowed from lizalou. I'm too tired at the moment to be very philosophical about them.

Your Blog Should Be Green

Your blog is smart and thoughtful - not a lot of fluff. You enjoy a good discussion, especially if it involves picking apart ideas. However, you tend to get easily annoyed by any thoughtless comments in your blog.

What Color Should Your Blog or Journal Be?

You Are Internal - Realist - Powerful

You feel your life is controlled internally. If you want something, you make it happen. You don't wait around for things to go your way. You value your independence and don't like others to have control. You are a realist when it comes to luck. You don't attribute everything to luck, but you do know some things are random. You don't beat yourself up when bad things happen to you... But you do your best to try to make your own luck. When it comes to who's in charge, it's you. Life is a kingdom, and you're the grand ruler. You don't care much about what others think. But they better care what you think!

The Three Dimension Luck and Power Test

You Are a Henna Gaijin!

You're not Japanese, but you wish you were! You can use chopsticks with your eyes closed, and you've memorized hundreds of Kanji. You even answer your phone "moshi moshi." While the number of anime videos you've seen is way higher than the number of dates you've been on, there's hope. Play the sexy, mysterous gaijin, and you'll have plenty of Japanese meat.

What's Your Japanese Subculture?

Your Hair Should Be Purple

Intense, thoughtful, and unconventional. You're always philosophizing and inspiring others with your insights.

What's Your Funky Inner Hair Color?

Technical Difficulties

Thought I would mention to Internet Exploder users for the PC:

I am now aware that you are having viewing issues with my blog, namely that the post start several pages down. I'm working on fixing the problem. That's what I get for not double-checking and testing my own stuff as much as I do my work stuff.

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I suppose it's about time I browsed some forums and did some brainstorming about all the mysteries of LOST. I think I held off so long partially because I didn't want to spoil myself and partially because I wanted to develop my own theories without influences. Then I decided I was stupid and lazy and far too obsessed with far too many things to actually spend enough time studying and reawatching LOST to find all the clues. Why go to all that effort when thousands of other nerdy fans have already done that work for me?

So, anyway, I came across some interesting bits of info and theories amongst all the driftwood. Everyone and their dog has a theory about the numbers though I've yet to see anyone point out that the last number is the answer to the life, the universe and everything. The introduction of the Dharma initiative in the most recent episode also raises a number of interesting theories. Combined with the strange quote from Jin at the end of the preview that apparently was actually a clip from some interview with the actor, and the fact that the man in the orientation video was Asian, some have theorized that Jin does speak English and was sent to this island by Sun's father who owns the whole Dharma initiative project. I think that's a little farfetched, but it's funny how people get all bent out of shape over previews. There's also some crazy theory about a book some one made up with a theory about the numbers and genetic mirroring or something... If it sounds too good to be true that's because it is.

Anyway, I thought these websites were rather interesting:

Oceanic Airlines
Hanso Foundation

This is also rather funny. If you go to the official website here and click on the barcode at the bottom and type in "theislandiswaiting" you get a pretty amusing bit of "discarded" script.
Lost Website

Also, I've found some discussion about the number 108 (the sum of the numbers in the sequence), including some that echoes my own thinking. I've included a couple of quotes on the subject:

"The number 108 is highly auspicious in the Buddhist religion. Buddhist mallas ("rosaries") have 108 beads; it is a custom among Japanese Buddhists to ring a large bell 108 times at the beginning of each year for new year's luck; and among some sects of Buddhism, there are said to be 108 human beings who could have achieved nirvana or buddhahood, but have chosen to reincarnate on Earth to serve suffering humanity."

"We encounter the figure 108 frequently in Buddhism, now once as the number of large Bodhisattvas, then as the number of mental disorders against which boeddha offered Dharma-doors, which means treatments."

"could this be the relation between 108 and sick. And could it be that Dharma doors 4-8-15-16-23-42 are the "doors" to be used (is there a door for every mental disorder)????"

"did they open the hatch on the 40th day? maybe they will open one on the 80th 150th 160th 230th and 420th day..."

I also hadn't noticed that the shark which attacks Michael and Sawyer has the Dharma symbol on it... That makes me think that it and the other examples of a "security system" do have something to do with the Dharma Initiative after all.

Well, enough theorizing for now...

Landmarks Are Made to Be Destroyed

It's an interesting quirk of the human psyche that as much as we enjoy seeing monuments built as a landmark for generations to come, we also enjoy imagining what it would be like to see those monuments destroyed, to watch them all come tumbling down. Perhaps I should have said it was a sick, twisted quirk. But it is true nonetheless. All you have to do is watch an action movie.

Destruction is interesting to watch. This has something to do with its speed, and something to do with the fact that we rarely get to see such events personally. Creation usually takes a long time; it requires vision and dedication to see it through to its end, and though its interesting to see it happen in a time lapse or historically recounted way, it is often too slow to keep our interest. Destruction generally happens very quickly. For all the time and effort it takes to build something from scratch, it can be destroyed in a matter of seconds with disgustingly little effort.

I suppose I've been thinking about this lately because I've been watching too much Full Metal Panic, and it's made me realize that Tokyo Tower is no longer the favorite landmark for destruction in anime. Odaiba, a man made island in Tokyo Bay, is one of the newest targets for fantasy destruction. I freaked when I saw a mecha fight taking place at Tokyo Big Sight, the location where we attended the Tokyo Anime Fair. Though I have yet to see it be destroyed, the enormous ferris wheel on Odaiba has also made an appearance in just about every anime I've seen lately. Too bad I didn't get a chance to ride on it while I was there. (I have a feeling it will be the next landmark to be destroyed by mecha or some kind of apocalyptic circumstance. I'm sure Clamp would be tempted to destroy it if they ever managed to finish X.

Though I don't really enjoy seeing landmarks destroyed I do like seeing places I've visited in animation. Even if it's only for a moment before they're turned into dust.

Randomness

So, I've been meaning to do this for awhile, but I don't get the chance over lunch (which is when I often make posts) since my music is all at home. That just means that I'm behind the times, as usual... I don't have a good playlist to use for this either, so I'll just have to take my chances with the entire Library, and we know how iTunes gets stuck in a pattern sometimes. Here we go...

What's On My Playlist:

The rules are simple: just put your player on Shuffle, load your usual music playlist, and let the questions be answered! MUSIC 8 BALL!

What do you think of me, iTunes?:
"Old School Game" ~Cowboy Bebop
This is a very video game-ish sounding song from the CB movie. I'm going to get really profound here and interpret this to mean that maybe iTunes thinks of me and the world outside the computer as a game under its control, while those of us outside the computer think we're the ones in control. A bit of a stretch, I know...

Will I have a happy life?:
"Heartbreaker" ~Pat Benatar
Wow. That doesn't sound good. I think iTunes was just messing with me on that one...I hope.

What do my friends really think of me?:
"Ocarina Boogie" ~from Zelda, remixed by The Black Lodge
So, my friends think I'm an upbeat, boogie-down sort of girl who likes to play music. I guess they must think I'm somewhat creative too since this remix doesn't actually sound like a sound from Zelda though it feels like it could be because of the instrumentation. I'm thinking about these way too much... Maybe they just think I should end up with someone like Link.

What does my S/O thinks of me?:
"The Spy" ~Final Fantasy VIII, Nobuo Uematsu
This is one of my favorite songs from Final Fantasy VIII. It's got that porno guitar going on that cracks me up, and...wait a minute. Porno? No, no, no, let's just say that my significant other (who is only imaginary at the moment) thinks I'm a little sneaky but fun. That doesn't sound too good either. Oh well.

Do people secretly lust after me?:
"FFX Ending Theme" ~Final Fantasy X, Nobuo Uematsu
Man, Nobuo really likes predicting my love life. Anyway, I'm going to go out on a limb with this one and say that since I was secretly (well, not so secretly, I suppose) lusting after Auron during this whole game and he played a major part in the action taking place during this song, that people might be lusting after me too. Unfortunately, they'll only find out that I'm dead, and have been dead the entire time they were lusting after me and now I'm going to become a firefly in the Farplane. Makes sense, right?

How can I make myself happy?:
"Silence and Motion" ~Final Fantasy VIII, Nobuo Uematsu
What's with all the Final Fantasy songs? They're not all I have on my compy, you know? Well, this has to be one of the trippiest songs I've ever heard, so I guess iTunes is telling me to take drugs. Thanks, iTunes.

What should I do with my life?:
"Fog Sea" ~Final Fantasy X, Nobuo Uematsu
I swear, if one more FF song comes up...!!! Anyway, this one is obviously not a lot of help. The equivalent of the Magic 8 Ball telling me things are unclear. Yeah, so my future's foggy. At least it's not definitely awful, I guess.

Why must life be so full of pain?:
"Lost Fragments" ~Chrono Cross, Yasunori Mitsuda
At least it's not FF... This is a very pretty, very sad song. I can't place it exactly in the game, but it is the guitar and cello version of the main theme. I guess life sucks because time is all screwed up.

How can I maximize my pleasure during shecks?:
"Anything but Love" ~Squirrel Nut Zippers
I think this one pretty much speaks for itself. Wow.

Will I ever have children?:
"Beautiful Alone" ~Weiß Kreuz, Yuuki Hiro
I guess not. This is the music box version too. Wah! So angsty!

Will I die happy?:
"Robo's Theme" ~Chrono Trigger, Yasunori Mitsuda
This is an upbeat theme about a robot who was created to serve humans. He ends up sacrificing himself for the future of the world in the sequel, so I guess that's a good way to go.

Can you give me some advice?:
"Crazy on You ~Heart
I've kept this song partially because I love the way it starts out with the guitar solo, but I suppose if this song's telling me something, it's that the world is insane, so there's nothing to do but find someone and make wild, crazy love to them. iTunes is naughty.

What do you think happiness is?:
"Learn to Do It--Reprise" ~Anastasia, David Newman
So, life is romance. Huh.


Okay, one more of these little test things... I thought it looked kind of cute. I'm not sure I'm being completely accurate on my favorite things, but my brain is having a hard time with thinking in general today.

Alias Found

1. YOUR PORN STAR NAME: (Name of first pet / Street you grew up on):
Rumour Quincy (That's not half bad)

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (Name of your favourite snack food / Grandfather's first name):
Brussels Clem (I guess I'm a cowboy)

3. YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME: (First word you see on your left / Favourite restaurant)
Epson Panera (I don't know that Panera's is my favorite, but it sounds good here)

4. EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS: (Favourite Spice / Last Foreign Vacation Spot):
Cardamom Nippon (thought nippon sounded better than Japan)

5. SOCIALITE ALIAS: (Silliest Childhood Nickname / Town Where You First Partied):
Al Lawrence (how boring...)

6. "FLY BOY" ALIAS (a la J. Lo): (First Initial / First Two or Three Letters of your Last Name):
A. Her. (Yes, I am a her)

7. ICON ALIAS: (Something Sweet Within Sight / Any Liquid in Your Kitchen):
Kudos Frappuccino (You know I had to work my favorite coffee drink in there somehow)

8. DETECTIVE ALIAS: (Favourite Baby Animal / Where You Went to High School):
Kitten Miege (The kitten part kind of throws me off)

9. BARFLY ALIAS: (Last Snack Food You Ate / Your Favourite Alcoholic Drink):
Cookie Hard Lemonade (That one so doesn't work)

10. SOAP OPERA ALIAS: (Middle Name / Street Where You Live):
Rochelle Monrovia (Hmm... not bad)

11. ROCK STAR ALIAS: (Favourite Candy / Last Name Of Favourite Musician):
Dove Kusano (I have a hard time picking my favorite candy, so I picked one that sounded good. I also have a hard time picking my favorite musician, so I picked the one who sings the song I've been listening to non-stop lately.)

One more thing

Oh yeah, forgot to point out my little favicon that I made for this page. (That would be the little icon next to the html address for those of you who've never heard of it) Cool, huh? I've been wanting to make one for quite some time, but was under the impression you had to buy some icon making program or something. But then I found this tutorial on a website linked to Franklin McMahon's and it told me everything I needed to know.

Favicon tutorial

Motivation, Inspiration, Creation

So, we all know that I often get involved in way too many projects at once. I push myself and try to get motivated and accomplish things, but the projects I create for myself have such a wide scope that I tend to get discouraged and frustrated with my lack of progress. Then I get lazy and burned out and don't work on them for awhile. Then I feel guilty about not getting anything done and try to force myself to work on them and end up making something I'm not satisfied with.

Well, I know I have issues, but apparently I'm not the only one with them. This is of course something I knew already, but it's always good to hear it again. It's also good to hear someone else's perspective on such things as well as input on how to make them happen.

Recently, I've started listening to Franklin McMahon's podcast, and I have to say it's making a difference already in my mood, my motivation and my confidence. So many of the things he is talking about are things I've been thinking about myself. It's almost eerie. But knowing I'm on the right track by hearing someone successful talking about them really helps my confidence.

You can find his website here. You can also find it in iTunes under podcasts.

Check it out. I don't think you'll regret it.

Through his website I also found out about a self-publishing website: www.lulu.com. It sounds totally awesome, and if—no, when—I finally get my story finished, I'll have to look into lulu as an option.

Well, that's it for today. I'm busy stuffing files and organizing things on our server.

Catch Up

It's been a long time since I've made a post. I think that is mostly due to the fact that I've been feeling incredibly blah lately for a number of reasons, but I didn't feel like writing about it because it 1) makes me feel even more blah thinking about it enough to write about it, and 2) it isn't fun to read about and just seems whiny and self-absorbed. So, those of you who are in frequent contact with me have already heard about my blahs, and if you haven't you probably don't need to hear about them anyway.

That said, let's talk about what I have been doing lately. I haven't been accomplishing much—at least, not as much as I would like—but I have been watching some new things.

I've been watching season three of Nikita after it was donated to the yellowdancer21 library by the Callow Queen, and I had no idea that the third season was the season of abrupt hair changes. I knew that the hair styles would change... I've seen random episodes from later seasons. But I didn't realize they changed all at once. Now Madeline has very short hair, Michael has short hair that they obviously don't know what to do with because it looks all bushy and 80's at the beginning (kind of like how Duncan's looked in the last season of Highlander), and Operations has gone white (which I think actually looks rather distinguished). I don't mind the changes so much, but they were still a bit of shock. I'm still a little iffy on whether Madeline's hair completely changed her character or not, though.

Now that I'm addicted to Gilmore Girls I've been watching the new episodes of that, and I want to slap Rory upside the head SO bad. And this week is the beginning of a new season of LOST! Let's hope it keeps up the momentum it had from last season and doesn't disappoint like Alias has lately.

As far as anime goes, I'm still watching Bleach (I'm a few episodes behind, but only a couple and once they've finished downloading I'll be all caught up); I've been watching Scrapped Princess and Shannon kicks major ass (he also likes to kick walls when he's frustrated); I've watched the first two DVD's of Mirage of Blaze and I'm excited to find that it has an interesting plot and not just shonen ai goodness (though it creeps me out how much the characters look like characters from X at times). Oh, and I watched Shamanic Princess a while back and that was really good too—trippy, but good. Last, but not least, I've also become addicted to Honey and Clover.



This anime is right up my alley. It's character driven, which means not a lot happens plot-wise, but I don't mind. I enjoy slice of life stories that focus on the character's emotions, thoughts and motivations. Let's face it; real life can be very hard sometimes— even without aliens, epic battles or super spies getting involved. I also really enjoy this anime because it focuses on art students who are all supposedly college age (though Hagu still looks like she's no older than ten) trying to figure out their direction in life, where they fit in with the people around them and who they love. So, it's totally shojo in that respect with lots of love triangles, squares and pentagons. But at the same time there's this element of nostalgia that makes me wistful about my own days in college—that feeling that you need to enjoy every single moment because it won't last forever and everyone will change in different ways once they graduate. I can completely empathise with Takemoto and his fear of the changes accompanying graduation and losing that feeling of belonging with his circle of friends. The art style of the series is nostalgic in and of itself, with faded colors and softened lines. It makes me so wistful it hurts at times...

But I would be remiss if I didn't mention the other aspect of Honey and Clover that I love: its sense of humor. This anime touches on some of the things I loved so much about Fruits Basket. It can make me cry and roll on the floor laughing in the same episode. Morita is insane. But SO much fun. And somehow, despite his carefree, oblivious demeanor, he deeply cares about the people around him, and somehow he manages to be a guardian angel for each of them at some point. I also enjoy Shuu-chan Sensei for his extreme protectiveness of Hagu (not to mention the fact that his voice actor also played Hughes in Full Metal Alchemist—he's good at the overprotective father role).

I also have to admit I find it extremely cool to see the characters visiting places I have seen or been to on my brief visit to Japan. Ueno park for Sakura viewing (I only wish Morita had shown up to sing for us when we were there), Odaiba with the huge ferris wheel...

Okay, so I'll stop going on about Honey & Clover but only so I can mention the pinnacle of my recent watching experience: Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children. It makes me weepy just thinking about it. It was everything I hoped for and more. I'm glad I didn't spoil myself too much for it, because it was nice watching it without really knowing what was going to happen. They really stayed true to the game, in my opinion, and it felt like they really did fans homage—they made it for us, not just to wring more money out of an old game—from the fanfare cell phone ring, to Barret saying "You're late, bitch," to the fight against Bahamut which was almost turn based like a fight in the game. And let's not forget Cloud's limit break, and the fact that he was actually unable to stand up straight because he was injured—I knew he was low on HP then. :) Reno and Rude were awesome too—who knew Reno could translate Tifa?—and I enjoyed the comic relief they provided. Even Rufus was cool, I have to say—and not just because he was played by the same voice actor who played Roy in FullMetal Alchemist. I still would love to see an omake with Rufus throwing back the hood of his cloak and revealing himself as Roy, though. That would be awesome.




The fight scenes were incredible, and the music was so awesome that I've already preordered the soundtrack. I think Square made a mistake by not releasing the movie here at the same time in Japan because I'm worried some people who watched the fansubbed version won't buy it. I can't imagine being so stupid, but I'm sure some people will be. It will be mine.

(sorry about including an angsty Cloud pic, but he was so angsty in the movie it's hard to find one where he isn't angsting)

So I did it...

I took the test on Lizalou's blog because I was bored, and now I'm posting it here for everyone's enjoyment or not enjoyment as the case may be. I don't understand how I ended up with the title of Nerd when my highest score is in Geekdom... Oh well. And here I've been calling myself a dork all this time.

Here are my results:


Modern, Cool Nerd

60 % Nerd, 73% Geek, 43% Dork
For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.

You scored better than half in Nerd and Geek, earning you the title of: Modern, Cool Nerd.

Nerds didn't use to be cool, but in the 90's that all changed. It used to be that, if you were a computer expert, you had to wear plaid or a pocket protector or suspenders or something that announced to the world that you couldn't quite fit in. Not anymore. Now, the intelligent and geeky have eeked out for themselves a modicrum of respect at the very least, and "geek is chic." The Modern, Cool Nerd is intelligent, knowledgable and always the person to call in a crisis (needing computer advice/an arcane bit of trivia knowledge). They are the one you want as your lifeline in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire (or the one up there, winning the million bucks)!

Congratulations!


Link: The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test written by donathos on OkCupid Free Online Dating

New Look. Same Quality Product.

So I finally got around to making a new template for my blog. I'm still working out the kinks, but I was just too excited to wait any longer. After many months of attempting to learn CSS and continually banging my head against the wall and whining, "I don't get it! Can't I just make a table?" I have finally learned enough to make a mostly funcitonal template.

I haven't tested it in all the browsers yet, but I'm kinda tired now... So, I guess the testing will come with time. Just think of it as a beta.

Also, I realize the links up there aren't really functional yet. DON'T click on them until I tell you to! Cuz all you're gonna get is a broken link, and nobody likes to hear Link scream. Like when he falls down into one o' them pits and screams bloody murder. Kills me every time... Poor Link.

Anyway, eventually, when I finally apply my new CSS look to the rest of my website (and actually update it too) those links will work and, hopefully this blog will fit seamlessly within the rest of my website at that point. Ah, just thinking about it makes me gushy. I'm so weird.

I'm interested in any feedback you may have.

I-70 Blues

I went to visit my cousin in Columbia this weekend. I had a great time with her and her husband. We went shopping, ate good food and watched some Nikita and Highlander.

The only downer was the trip home. What should have been about a 2 1/2 hour trip took FIVE HOURS. There was a car accident. I'm still trying to find information on it and exactly what happened, but from what I--and the new friends I made on the road--pieced together four cars were involved and one of them blew up. We were stuck on the same stretch of highway (without moving more than half a mile) for 3 hours. A highway that usually feels like a racetrack had turned into a parking lot.

It was a surreal experience. I had seen the plumes of thick black smoke from a distance, but didn't even think about the possibility of them being the result of a car wreck. I started to wonder when I saw the helicopter and we started slowing down. Within minutes, the highway was packed with vehicles of all sizes and shapes for miles, but we all somehow managed to maneuver ourselves out of the way for the emergency vehicles to get past half an hour later. After an hour or two of moving no more than two feet, everyone had turned their vehicles off and many people were standing outside just to get some breeze. I made friends with the ladies in the car in front of me. They were kind enough to give me a bottle of water which really saved me because I hadn't brought anything to drink at all.

While it was frustrating being stuck on a stretch of highway without a way out (the next exit was on the other side of the wreck) it was also sobering to think about the reason we were stuck there. Several people's lives were probably changed forever--or even over. Our lives would only be inconvenience for a little while.

When we finally got to moving again, and passed the place where it had happened, workers were still struggling to put out the fire that had spread onto the grass beyond the highway. The remains of two of the vehicles were piled up on trucks parked on the shoulder--they were beyond totalled. One looked a little like the car from Planes Train and Automobiles except that the engine section was nothing but ashes. The other car was missing wheels and crunched together into an unrecognizable mess.

As awful and chilling as this sight was to me, apparently not everyone was as deeply affected. Within minutes many cars were driving at the same breakneck speed ten or twenty miles over the speedlimit, and dodging in between vehicles with only feet to spare between them.

By the time I got home I was physically and mentally exhausted. My left arm was sunburnt and I had a headache the size of Africa. But at least I was still alive and relatively healthy. If I had left a little bit sooner I might have been involved in that accident.

Dream Again

So, I had another weird dream last night, and I'm sure you peoples don't really care all that much, but I find them interesting, and I've never actually kept a dream journal so I thought I would record some of them here.

Anyway, so I don't remember a lot about my dream except for a couple random fragments. One of them involved my dad and I going to see a movie (don't know what it was) and there was this little girl there (who looked a lot the girl from Yotsuba&! which I just purchased last night) and she instantly made friends with me as we walked in and didn't want to let go of my arm. When we got up to buy our tickets, dad offered to buy all of our tickets (I totally can't see him doing that--though sometimes I suppose he can be really generous) and the girl wanted a row behind the one we chose. Yeah, you had to choose your seat like they do in movie theaters in Japan. Well, we couldn't figure out which way the numbers went so I asked the lady at the counter. She was really snotty and informed me that I could easily figure it out. "You just use the rule of unique distances," she said. "It's like driving to Colorado. Or New Orleans. You have to use unique distance equations to figure out distances of that magnitude, so all you have to do is use an equation to find out which distance is larger!" I did not act like she had said something completely unintelligible. Instead, I screamed, "Well, then I'd need to know the size of the theater, wouldn't I? I can't do an equation without any of the variables!"

Don't know where all that came from. The only other part of my dream I remember is near the end. My mom and I were up in the attic of a house that looked nothing like our house, but in the dream it was. Anyway, we were busy closing all of these tiny crystal windows because a storm was coming and we didn't want the rain to come in. There were hundreds of these windows and they were all about 3 inches square and cut with a bevel like a mirror (why they were called crystal windows). We were hurriedly turning the little cranks on the windows to get them closed when a huge Michelin truck pulled up (don't ask me) and raised up a platform so this guy on the platform could inform us we won their competition. Then suddenly all of our family members and a whole bunch of cameramen and reporters came in to photograph all of us and congratulate us on our award.

What the hell? I didn't even drink or eat anything odd last night. Anyway, thinking back on it just cracks me up though.

Orange Juice, Anyone?

I forgot to mention the crazy dream I had last night. It was long, and most of it was fairly uninteresting. The part I wanted to share was near the end when I changed from myself to Winry from Full Metal Alchemist. Don't know why that happened, but at one point I was no longer myself, but Winry. Anyway, I/Winry was looking for Ed for some reason (but really, when is she in the show and not looking for Ed?) and I ended up in an indoor jungle (don't ask me, I don't know either) and I saw Riza and Roy and some General guy sitting under a palm tree. Roy and the General were sitting at a table and there was a fruit juicer on the table between them. (I know that this showed up simply because I had been using a juicer instruction manual for reference on a project I worked on the day before). So, all the anime characters were in 3-d, but they still looked exactly like anime characters--same proportions, etc. Did you know that anime characters are extremely freaky when they're not flat? I seriously couldn't even look at Roy very long because he totally freaked me out. But I just found it really amusing that the whole time he was talking to me and sucking up to the general, he was sitting there juicing an orange. This was the fancy model of juicer that has a pulp adjuster on it too, so I'm sure Sheridan would have been pleased. He could set the pulp adjuster to hella lotta pulp. That would have made his day.

Yeah...random.

What's Outside my Window

Please forgive me for not knowing how to use this camera (it's the one from work) and not knowing how to make it focus manually. But I just had to share this. I've never seen such a big praying mantis so up close and personal. Scale is difficult to discern from this photo, but it was a little bigger than my hand. Thank God it's on the other side of the window from me. It gives me the jibblies...

I think I'm turning Brittish. I really think so.

I have been reading a lot of books by Brits lately between all the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy books and Harry Potter. Add to that the fact that I've been watching Monty Python's Flying Circus and I think I'm a bit of a lost cause... I'm starting to use Brittish slang (at least in my head) and I'm having a hard time resisting speaking with an accent. Brings me back to the days of pit band (yes, pit band, not orchestra--I went to a rather small high school) and My Fair Lady. "The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain." I was constantly tempted to speak with an accent during that time as well.

So, anyway, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is one of the best Harry Potter books so far. Can't decide if I like it better than the third one or not. It had everything I'd wanted, some I didn't want, but predicted, and extra surprises to boot. I laughed, I cried, I cursed. And I read it in like two days. Yeah... It's over....wah!!! I want the next one now!!! And from what I've heard, she's already written it too. I won't go into spoilers since I promised this post would be spoiler free, but it is tempting... Okay, I'll spoil one itsy bitsy tiny thing. U-No-Poo. I won't explain. You can just imagine what the hell that's about. The only thing I'll say was that I totally cracked up when it was mentioned.

On a complete sidenote, I have to admit I've gotten addicted to Neopets. It's silly and childish and an awful lot of fun. I have a green Ixi named Stifremin (Jalapanous for "it's fresh and minty) and he is delighted at the moment because I've spoiled him and played with him a lot. He's also full because I just fed him an orange bat cookie for breakfast. Yummy. I'm kinda pissed though because I didn't realize you were stuck with your neohome where it is after you'd signed up for your account and I totally didn't pay any attention to it because I thought it was changeable. So, I've got a neohome in the most boring place of all--not where I wanted to be. Oh well... They say that someday they plan to offer the option of changing your neohome.



Yeah, so I'm easily addicted. Don't look at me like that...

Maybe my pet should be Brittish?

This time I mean it

Discovery has reached orbit. Good luck, and come home safely.

Stay tuned for my spoiler-free commentary on Harry Potter in my next post...

Just kidding

So, the launch of Discovery has been called off for today because of a sensor not functioning properly. No go for launch. Better luck next time.

Return to Flight

The space shuttle Discovery is scheduled to launch at 3:51 p.m. EDT today. You can watch the countdown until liftoff on NASA's website: Return to Flight

It's been two and a half years since the Colombia disaster, and now, finally, NASA's sending another shuttle into space. You can prepare and test and inspect and double check all you want, but nothing is ever 100% safe, especially something as risky as space travel. There are simply too many variables and unknowns. But the astronauts are willing to put their lives on the line in the name of science, so if they are willing to take the risk I say we should let them. There are still so many things in the universe we don't understand, so much territory that has never been explored.

So good luck, Discovery, and come home safely.

Happy Shish Kabob!

My friend, shivaindis said that this comic needed to be made. I have fulfilled my duty and made it. It's brief and brilliant. Well, maybe not brilliant. It's rather stupid, actually. But at least it is brief.

So, recently homestarrunner.com made an amusing toon about the fourth of july called "Happy Fireworks." You might want to view it here before continuing--otherwise you might be kind of lost.

So my friends and I were discussing Final Fantasy VII and character deaths, and how Aeris wouldn't be as popular as she is if she hadn't died since her character is basically a Mary Sue (for non fanfic readers, a Mary Sue is a character who is a little too perfect in every way--there's a bit more to it than that, but that's good enough for now). We even went so far as to say Aeris isn't much more exciting than a piece of cardboard. Then we remembered "Happy Fireworks" and the rest is history. Add to the cardboard thing that it's a common thing in roleplaying games for the main character to never talk though everyone always understands what they "say" and replies to them, and we have a strange scenario.

You can view my mini comic silliness here.

Office Supply Fetish

Is it weird to love office supplies as much as I do? Because I do—love them, that is.

Mom shared a coupon book for Office Depot (or "Office Despot" as my dad is wont to call it) and I found one I thought I could use (a coupon for Sharpies and I had been wanting some of those Sharpie retractables ever since I saw a commercial for them and almost had a heart attack). So, I asked mom if she wanted to go with me to the store (and office supplies aren't normally her thing but I so rarely ask her to go shopping with me that she couldn't refuse).

I was in heaven. I purposely avoid office supply stores because I know they are my weakness (trips to get design projects bound back in school were often more fun than they should have been because I would wander aimlessly around the store finding cute office supplies I couldn't refuse). But, I think the time away from such stores makes my excitement even worse when I actually do shop at them.

So, I got giddy... Over these cool notebooks with elastic to keep them shut (which come in charming "choco-latte" color schemes, btw), a soft Five Star pencil bag that's made to stand up with see-through mesh on the bottom half, and mini Sharpies in a variety of colors. I decided the retractables were not the best idea since they would dry out more quickly and they were also far larger than they needed to be--and the mini Sharpies were just too friggin' cute!!! They even come with hooks at the top so you can put them on your keychain. Is that not the cutest thing ever? Now I can label my burned cds in a variety of beautiful colors.

I can't explain why I get so excited about office supplies. It seems almost wrong somehow. Yet, I can't help it. I just feel so organized and nerdy cool when I've got fresh notebooks, pens, mechanical pencils and organization tools. (But why, oh why can't I find those neat little circular paper clips? They're so much cooler than regular paper clips). Maybe it's because shopping for such things brings me back to the days of "back to school" time when finding your cool folders and notebooks (and trapper keepers) for the next year was so important. Maybe it just seemed more important at my school because we wore uniforms--but no, I think I've always been obssessed with it just because.

Honestly, I think office supplies are one of my favorite things in the universe. The satisfaction one gets from writing with a really good pen that just seems to glide over the paper like butter, or, likewise, of writing on really good paper that just feels rich and textured. The joy one feels in looking at a freshly organized desk with all the papers, pens and pencils, paperclips, postits, etc, each in their own little nook within various organizational shelves and drawers. Ah, it's enough to make me say "ah" again.

So, in conclusion: Office Supplies. Try them. You'll like them. And so will your desk.

Why We Love Tori-san

What a wonderful coincidence. I was planning on posting a picture on my blog today and blogger has just added the upload picture option to their blogs, saving me the hassle of putting it on my ftp server and making a link, etc, etc.

Anyway, I just purchased Fruits Basket Book 10 yesterday (in English—I already had it in Japanese) and I've already read it. It's getting into the part of the manga that was written after the series was made, so it's nice to know exactly what's going on, especially in the scenes with Akito. I really enjoyed the bit about Mayu and Hatori (obviously, since the picture above is from that section) because it gives me hope that Hatori will be happy someday! I was kind of surprised to find Shigure isn't as much of a player as he always acts like he is, and he also made me happy by his lack of evilness in the way he tried to hook up Hatori and Mayu. I mean, he's evil, but not irredeemably so. Akito, on the other hand, is a cold, evil bitch. It's still too freaky for me to think of Akito as a girl...shiver.

I have to proclaim how much I love Natsuki Takaya though (the creator of Fruits Basket). She is my hero. Not only has she written one of the best, most emotional and hilarious stories I've ever read/watched, but I can also relate to who she is in real life. I have to share a couple quotes from her Blah Blah Blah sections:
“Anyway, it doesn't really matter what I write here so—There are times when I cry suddenly, like turning on the lights, without caring what's around me, and times when I can't do anything but cry. Afterwards, I like to happily eat rice.”
--I feel like I should try the rice thing sometime since I've already got the crying part down pat.
“When I was little...I thought that if you swallowed the seeds, a watermelon would grow. I also worried that if I swallowed gum, it would grow too. Thinking about it now, I really wonder why...”

Well, I know there was something else I was planning on talking about in this post, but now I've completely forgotten. So, for now, I'll say adieu.

5 Minute Argument

"An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a definite proposition . . . an argument is an intellectual process . . . contradiction is just the automatic gainsaying of anything the other person says."

Yes, I know, I'm on a Monty Python kick this week. I've found a way to make everything somehow relate. That aside, this quote makes a point I feel to be very true.

I enjoy debates—well thought out discussions of a subject, with different people taking different points of view and trying to defend them . . . not because they are truly personally attached to any particular point of view, or because they are even angry or annoyed at all. An argument just for the sake of arguing, not one tied to emotions. I enjoy them, but that doesn't mean I'm always in the mood for them. They can be tiring in their own way if they go on too long or if your wits aren't up to the challenge.

Arguments based on pure emotion though are always exhausting and often leave you feeling weary of the world in general. Rarely are they uplifting, unless they were actually caused by some completely unrelated emotions that came out in an unexpected way. These kind of arguments, fueled by emotions which have nothing to do with the subject of the argument, can be a great stress reliever, but you better not pick your argument with someone who doesn't understand that you truly love them despite it all and that you're just blowing off steam. It's also a bad idea to always target the same person in such arguments without showing them positive attention as well. No one wants to be your whipping boy, and no matter how many times you apologize for your outbursts or how much the person understands your need for them, the constant bashing will wear the relationship down to nothing. In any case, it's always better to avoid one of these arguments if possible.

Now we come to my least favorite form of argument—though I admit I've certainly participated in a number of these kinds of arguments myself—contradiction. It can be fun sometimes, when both parties know it's just a game and are just being light-hearted about it, but this is not always the case. Contradiction happens naturally because not everyone agrees on everything, so, unless they are a yes man who always agrees just to get along, people will have opposite views from time to time. The problem comes in when the contradiction descends into a childish game of opposites where one or more parties always choose the other point of view. This can be a matter of pride, an attempt to squash another's pride by making them feel as if they are constantly wrong. It can be just a childish game with no other purpose other than to piss someone off. Or it can be a simple manifestation of a person's bad mood; they're feeling left out so they're going to be a martyr and always be the one on the other side of the fence whether its how they really view things or not.

I'll admit, I'm no stranger to contradiction. I'm probably better at it than I should be. But I also know how it feels to be on the other side. It, frankly, sucks. Especially when the contradictions are not a one day, bad mood thing. Sometimes people just rub each other the wrong way. I understand this. But it can be very wearying when you are the constant target of contradiction from a single person or group of people. No matter what you say, no matter how much it seems to align with what the other person has just said or seems to believe, they will contradict you. They will say you're wrong again and again and again, and then, or someone else, will turn around and say almost exactly the same thing you said and act like it's an original idea.

Like I said, this is no problem when it's an occasional occurence. You should feel honored that this person feels comfortable enough with you as a friend/relative that they take their life's frustrations out on you, knowing that you will forgive them. On the other hand, if this abuse goes on too long, the "victim" (I know that's probably too harsh of a word, but I couldn't think of a better one) simply gets tired and a little bitter. They become sensitized to what the other person says so that comments which normally wouldn't be that big of a deal build up and small things the other person says instantly bother them. This is why families tend to argue a lot when they've been around each other too much. They are sensitized to each other, so they instantly react to comments which they could easily ignore, or even laugh at in other circumstances.

Anyway, time's up. I'm afraid if you want more nonsensical rambling, you'll have to pay for another five minutes. But I doubt anyone's going to do that. I ramble enough as it is . . .

And now... The Larch.

And now...

The Larch.


I feel about as exciting as a block of wood today. I suppose that's okay so long as I'm not too knotty. HA!

See what I'm talking about? Yeah. I must have had some bran flakes this morning or something, because I feel about as interesting as Sinclair. But, I suppose that's likely to happen if you get up super early to renew your car tag and then get to work super early too. And then you sit there thinking, "Wow, I'm really tired. Why am I awake?" And then you make a post about it so you can share you boringness and exhaustion with the whole world—or at least the two or three people who actually read your blog.

But, if all goes well, I should be going to see Howl's Moving Castle tonight again, and this time I should be able to understand what people are saying, though I don't think I could enjoy it any more than I did the first time in Japan. Still, I think the excellence of the first watching had something to do with the setting...and the mochi ice cream bar I smuggled into the theater. I can't wait until the scene with the bath towel and the slime. It sounds disgusting, but it's definitely my favorite scene in the movie. I would say more, but I don't want to spoil it too much for the tender ears of theCallowQueen.

Anyway, here's to this day being better than the last! If it isn't, I just might cry. wah!


And now...

The Larch.


PS. If you're wondering where the hell the larch thing came from, it's from Monty Python's flying circus, so it, of course, makes no sense. Just imagine it in a Brittish accent. You can't go wrong.

Do You Ever Wonder Why You Even Bother?

Sometimes I do. I try so hard sometimes and it just doesn't make any difference. I'm misinterpreted, people think the worst of me and jump to conclusions that I'm trying to be mean. I don't understand it. Evidently I don't know how to communicate with people very well, or maybe I just have a knack for pissing people off without meaning to. Sometimes I'm just stupid and push people's buttons without knowing they're there—though I suppose I should know better.

Either way, it kind of frustrates me that anyone who knows me would think I would mean to hurt them or intentionally say things to upset them. Do they really know me at all? Anyone who does know me would know that's the last thing I mean to do. Good intentions have rarely done me any good though because people always seem to assume my intentions are bad. Sometimes I just get tired of it. It seems like I just keep trying to get past this flaw—figure out what it is about how I say things that upsets people so I can fix it. I try and try and never get anywhere. Every time I think I've made some progress and everything's going great, I do it again.

So, I'm sorry world. I'm sorry to anyone I've hurt without meaning to. I'm sorry for feeling sorry for myself. I'm sorry I'm overly sensitive about things.

This isn't a cry for sympathy—in fact, I don't really want a ton of comments tell me "was it me?" or "I'm sorry if I upset you" because its highly unlikely the person involved will ever read this and respond anyway. The truth is, I just needed to vent. And I'm experiencing my most special time of the month which makes me extremely happy at the moment. It doesn't help that I've been on the verge of depression for no logical reason whatsoever the last couple weeks either.

In other words, I know I'm overreacting and whining. I'm sorry for that too. But, I'll get over it. Thanks for letting me vent about it though! (yes, she's thanking a frickin' blog) I feel better now... ;)

On a happier note though, I had a great time taking pictures with the CallowQueen, MathBuddha and MathBuddha's mom last night. Lot's of fun. Now I get to see if any of them came out... Cross your fingers!!! If they did come out, I'll have to christen my flickr account with some piccies then I'll have to make a new post with some linkies.

(If you couldn't tell, things are slow at work this morning...)

It's the Arts

This post isn't really about anything in particular. I just wanted to have an excuse to share how much I enjoyed an episode of Monty Python's Flying Circus I recently watched with my dad. I enjoyed the skit about a certain little known composer in particular. His name was...

Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-
fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-
thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-
grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-
bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein-nurnburger-bratwustle-gernspurten-
mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shonedanker-kalbsfleisch-
mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm.

It is now my goal, nay, my duty to memorize this name. Let's all do our best!

P.S. I watched two more episodes of Scrapped Princess and I'm thinking Shannon kicks some major ass. Also, upon rewatching some fifth season Babylon 5 episodes, I've realized that Delenn really is a heartless bitch to Lennier. She totally teases him. Bad Delenn! No...no, please...don't make the ugly face!!! But now I can't decide...should I call her Delenn or Russeau? Ah, that's easy. She'll always be Delenn, even when she's playing Russeau. "You have three choices. Run. Hide. Or Die," sounds an awful lot like, "Only one human captain has ever survived battle with a Minbari fleet. He is behind me. You are in front of me. If you value your lives, be somewhere else."

Legal Drug

I wonder how many search engines will pull up my blog with that post title…

Anyway, I'm not talking about CLAMP's manga by the same title. No, I'm talking about caffeine. No matter how you look at it, it's a drug, and the number of people addicted to it is mind boggling.

I think I'm joining their ranks. For a long time, I was picky about how I consumed my caffeine. I liked soda pop (Dr. Pepper/Mr. Pibb/Root Beer), the really syrupy kinds. I liked Mountain Dew too. I guess I shouldn't use past tense since I still like all of those drinks, but anyway. I started gaining weight and decided to switch to diet so I drink DDrP (Diet Dr. Pepper) and DSL (Diet Sunkist Lemonade) and now I've gotten into all the variety of diet root beers. As for hot drinks, I stuck with the really creamy, fattening crap, ie Frappucino, Cappucino, Espresso. I didn't like tea except for chai (though now I like green tea).

But now, I'm venturing into the world of real coffee. Damn those pod coffee machines that make single cups of coffee so easily. Damn Juan Valdez and his 100% pure colombian coffee, the Richest Coffee in the World™. Damn that fancy Japanese restaurant I went to that served coffee with real cream. Damn the coffee breath I will soon be sharing with the world. Damn damning things, just because I wanted to say “damn” again!

Yeah, so that's it. I'm hooked. I will never sleep again. But think of how much more I could get done…

Summer in the City

So, I'm the first one here at work and there is no air conditioning. And, according to weather.com we'll have a high of 88 degrees with 65% humidity.

Today is going to be a fun day. If I don't cut my head off by the end of the day because of the monster headache I can already feel coming on, it will be a miracle.

I don't want to hear any taunts of "Oh, it's so chilly in my office I had to put on a sweater" now. You will be putting your life in danger. ;)

A Little Advertisement...

Please don't hurt me, Adobe. I don't own you and I mean no harm. It's just a little parody...

Live What You Preach

This sunday, the pastor of our church announced that he would be leaving our parish. His mother is very ill and his duties to the parish were interfering with his duty to her as her son to take care of her. He is leaving for a good reason, but that doesn't make the change any easier.

We have been a part of St Agnes parish since we moved here ten years or so ago. It is not the closest church to us, so technically we should be going to a different one, but we fell in love with the environment, the people...and the pastor. Since Fr. Cullen is not the only priest at our parish, I don't necessarily see him every week, but the lessons he teaches in his homilies are so simple and yet so true and appropriate to my own life that I often feel as if he is talking directly to me. He has a way of reaching people, of making them feel important and loved individually while always reminding us that we are a community and that we are all here to help each other. I have never met a priest who was so down-to-earth and humble who could still communicate to me so effectively on a spiritual level. Unlike the pastor of the Catholic Campus Center I attended in college, Fr. Cullen stays true to the teachings of the church without losing sight of the most important thing: the people.
At many of the other churches where I have attended mass, I've felt as if the rituals were too elaborate and the sermons too metaphorical and out of reach. Fr. Cullen always manages to bring the message behind the scriptures into focus, making it salient for us in our lives now rather than setting it on a pedastal so high no one can see it clearly enough to know how it applies at all. You can tell that he genuinely cares for every person in the parish. He is always thinking of others, acknowledging their efforts and appreciating them for the work they do around the church.

Some priests wear their faith like a badge of honor to be shoved in other's faces. They put it on their chest as a sign of their holiness, but don't ever prove it with their actions. Fr. Cullen lives his faith. He doesn't brag, and he doesn't force it down your throat. He demonstrates what he belives by how he lives, and he shares it with you in common speech, as if you are a long-time friend having a conversation around the dinner table. And, in essence that is what the church is supposed to be about; a group of friends meeting around a dinner table, sharing spiritual food to sustain them through another week.

A church shouldn't be about a priest, so Fr. Cullen's leaving shouldn't change our parish. Still, I can't imagine his replacement equaling Fr. Cullen's impact on my life. He will still be around town, and maybe I'll run into him occasionally. But until then he will be missed.

Adobe Pueblo: The Design Suite of the Future

This is the direction progams are going.

With every new generation (6, 8, X, CS, MX, CS2, etc) the lines between what one program or another can do become blurred. Since Adobe has bought out Macromedia and is now the hog of design program companies everywhere (Quark, you can burn in hell), lets use it as an example.

Illustrator is a vector-based graphics program. You can use it for illustrations and logos and such things that need to be resized without becoming pixelated or losing quality. Photoshop is for digital imaging, like doctoring photos to take off that pimple on your nose, or making multilayered artwork with special effects, drop shadows, etc. InDesign is for page layout and allows you to import various photoshop and illustrator files and lay them out with text for a magazine, newsletter, flyer, poster, etc. These are very simplified descriptions, but they work for our purposes.

So, Photoshop is mostly for photos and images, BUT you can make text in it (useful if you want some cheesy effects like drop shadows) and Illustrator also allows you to use type (which makes sense considering type is vector-based) but it also allows you to import rasterized images (photoshop files) or actually rasterize artwork within it. In other words, if you wanted, you could make Illustrator work as a layout program instead of using InDesign. Conversely, InDesign and Photoshop also both allow you to make some vector-based illustration, so you could use them to a limited extent as a replacement for Illustrator. This is great for people who really only need to adjust their photos, but occasionally might like to add a caption or make a poster out of them. They only have to buy one program. For designers though, who need all of these capabilities, the overlap is useful for working on files from one program to another, but much of the overlap is redundant.

What this all boils down to are two different points. First, Adobe's programs have a lot of overlap, and this overlap has been growing with each successive version. Secondly, at what point will the overlap stop growing? When will we have—instead of a suite of programs—one huge, mega, multipurpose program? The trend suggests that someday this will happen. Still, it seems like poor marketing since, in order to make any money, the program would have to be extremely expensive, and people who only need one aspect of the program's abilities would be unable to justify the cost. So, part of me doubts that this “one program for everything” theory will ever come true. But even so...wouldn't it be freakin’ awesome?

Can you imagine a progam that allows you to do everything from designing logos to laying out a book to editing photographs to making webpages to building animated games? No more “make the logo in illustrator, the background in photoshop, layout the elements and type in QuarkXPress” or “make a layout, cut it apart and export it for web in photoshop, code it all in dreamweaver, add animated intro in flash.” No more computer crashing because you need five programs running in order to do all the steps without opening and closing programs fifty times.

And this is why my friend, neowolf, and I, dream that someday there will be an Adobe Pueblo, a house for all programs. (I'm sorry Quark, you're not invited.) Neither of us will be able to afford it, but wouldn't it be beautiful?

Interior Design Mad Libs

I'll admit, I've watched home redecorating shows from time to time. That's not why I'm redecorating my room. It has absolutely nothing to do with it. Really. I haven't been influenced in the least by all the room makeover programs I just happened to catch in bits and pieces while I my mom was watching. Not even when I sat down to finish watching the episode and find out what the homeowners think about their new bedroom redesigned as a crypt.

So, maybe they've influenced me just a little. But my bedroom was still in need of an overhaul in order to rid it of its extreme boringness. The space is (I suppose I should say was) stuffed full of junk I've collected over the years, and while some of the stuff looks really cool on its own, it gets lost in the eclectic mishmash of crap hanging on the walls, covering the shelves and stuffed in the corners. There is such a thing as an “eclectic style,” but, in my opinion, the eclectic style is the design world's attempt to make disorganized packrats feel a little better about their habits. I'm in need of a clean sweep. The walls—which haven't been painted since the previous homeowners remodeled the basement—are in desperate need of a fresh coat of paint, there are dust bunnies hiding under my bed, and I have no more room on my bookshelves.

I'm trading in my white walls and powder blue ceiling (boy was that ever a mistake) for a pale yellow ceiling, two vivid, red-orange walls and two tan walls. My new bedspread is red and I have a throw and some pillows made out of Indian saris. Many of my design elements are Indian, but I suppose it would be more accurate to say theme is Asian theme. I'm going for a rich, earthy feel contrasted against the bright colors and intricate patterns of the Indian fabric.

While you know I'm really excited to see how it turns out, I'm even more excited to get all the objects that were in my room out of the family room and back where they belong. I know that process will take a lot of thought and effort because not everything can come back in, and everything needs organization. In other words, I'm enjoying the painting stage because it's fun to see the walls change color, but I know I'm going to have my work cut out for me when it comes to putting everything back together, so I'm eager to get that part started. The sooner I get started, the sooner I'll be done.

More than anything though, I can't wait to sleep in my own bed again. I feel like I'm a guest in my own home. I can't wait until it's done!